Recognising the truth can often be very painful, but it makes you immensely free.
I grew up in a Catholic family in Lower Bavaria and attended a convent school. Due to my musical talent, I spent most of my childhood and youth in church. "Faith" was central to my life. Various unpleasant incidents in young adulthood in the church community showed me for the first time how painful realisation and truth can be.
In search of
So I set out in search of the truth. I read books, attended seminars, had tearful experiences, had doubts, etc...
The more I read, got to know people and attended seminars, the more confused I became: Who is right now? What is the truth? And so began my journey to myself!
Immerse myself in spirituality
One of the triggers for me to open up to the spiritual world was my recurring fears, not health and not freedom.
How I longed to finally be free! Free from the stressful job. Free from constraints and "must". So - quit my job. Hooray - I'm free! I decide my working hours and what I do. Hooray - I'm free! OR AM I? Outwardly, I was free now. No one to tell me what to do. I'M FREE AFTER ALL! So why doesn't it feel like that at all?
The first message after I had tentatively opened up to the spiritual world was: "Be yourself"! Huh? But I am myself. I can see myself in the mirror. I'm right there! Well, if the spiritual world is sending me such strange messages, it's probably not the right thing for me. I want to be told clearly what I should do now! I want to be "saved". After all, the famous Christmas carol says "Christ the Saviour is here!" And right at the bottom - in the darkness of darkness I realised: ONLY I CAN SAVE MYSELF!
Ancient wisdom teachings
I followed in the footsteps of the ancient shamans, researched the Vedic scriptures, learnt about anthroposophical philosophy and hermetic laws and deepened my knowledge with psychological training. The deeper I travelled, the more I realised that I was actually not "myself". I learnt the truth about myself! I learnt about the deep pain, the longing!
Peel the onion
I always say to my clients: The journey to yourself is like peeling an onion. We all carry issues from our lives, from past lives and from our ancestors. When I muster the courage to face the truth, I begin to peel the onion. Layer by layer, until I reach my inner wisdom. Peeling can be very painful. I can slip with the knife and cut my finger. Tears flow and leave marks on my face and eyes. But when the onion is peeled and cut, it cleanses our bodies and brings flavour into our lives.
My onion is a really big butcher's onion! And the more I peel it, the more the tears and (heart) blood flow, the closer I get to wisdom, truth and freedom. Again and again I came across a frightened little Maria. And suddenly I realise: THE TRUTH IS IN ME AND THIS TRUTH MAKES ME FREE!
I scrutinise! Everything and everyone! Even messages from the spiritual world. It's about independence, self-determination, self-confidence and autonomy. I am free in my thinking, decisions and my will. I am happy to accept recommendations and opinions, but I question and live MY truth.
Self-knowledge
The more I get to know myself (this is far from over), the more I come into freedom and the stronger the connection to the spiritual world becomes, the more clearly I recognise the truth. In the past, I didn't read books if someone (authority) told me not to read it because it wasn't good. Now I form my own opinion and my inner truth-teller strikes out immediately! So far, the pointer has always been right.
Faith
I am often asked whether I believe in God! For me, the answer is not "yes" or "no". For me, it's not about "faith" and "believing" in something. I feel, experience and trust my intuition.
A divine experience is that I have come a little way towards my inner wisdom, my spark and my light! A divine experience is that I have come a little way towards my inner wisdom, my spark and my light!
Everything is interconnected and every living being on this earth deserves appreciation and respect, because everything is "divine".
I experience... what important information I receive in my communication with the spiritual world. I experience... when I go into my garden, the birds greet me and thank me for the water and food I put out for them. I experience... that my vegetables and lettuce grow better when I talk to them and sing to them. I experience... that the divine creative power is within me. I experience... that when I ask for information and support, I receive it immediately. I experience... that nature with all its active ingredients and beings saved my life 8 years ago. I experience... that I first check, scrutinise and then act. I experience... that I see and perceive issues in people I don't know and that I am right.
I stopped "believing" and started thinking, experiencing, trusting and feeling! I pulled the mask off my fear and took away its power.
The biggest obstacle to truth and freedom is fear. It prevents me from thinking, it prevents me from questioning and it prevents me from seeing the truth.
Have the courage to face the truth and live freely!
If you would like to experience what it feels like to be in the divine flow, I look forward to making an appointment with you.
In May 2019, my cancer check-up was due and there was an abnormal finding. My doctor told me to wait and come back in November 2019. This appointment included an extended examination and a special tumour test. This test turned out to be positive. In this case positive didn’t mean good. The doctor recommended surgery to remove the cancerous cells that may be present.
There it was again, the fear! The position of fear on a timeline is in the future. It means the incident has not yet happened and I was scared of something that hadn’t happen yet. With this knowledge I started my self-experiment in inclusion of body, soul, and mind and under expert supervision. I didn’t want surgery and gave myself 6 months for my self-healing experiment.
My self-experiment
Body
I started a detox program for 3 months on a naturopathic basis. I adjusted the ayurvedic food plan by eating a lot of green foods, drinking herbal teas and putting spicies into my food to support my digestion fire. Additionly I started homeopathic microimmunotherapy for 3 months and Vitamin D3 in combination with Viatmin K to supplement my plan. I prescribed myself a lot of rest (it was the hardest for me) and timeouts. My body temperature was too low and my immune system too weak, so it was an invitation for viruses to infect my body. Viruses and Cancer Cells don’t like the warmth. I ate only warm meals with ingredients that warm the body and took baths to increase my body temperature to a normal level. All of these were under expert supervision. I wouldn’t do this on my own.
Mind
The important thing for me was to escape the trap of persistent pondering and my fear. I practiced mind hygiene and met my fears in a firm but friendly manner through meditation. I didn’t allow it to block and paralyse me, to pin me down in a state of shock or to dehumanise me. I wrote small notes which read “I am healthy” and put them on every surface I came across every day to remind myself about the power of self-healing. One note even informed my tea. On a spiritual level, I connected with my body and lovingly asked it to activate its self-healing powers. Homeopathy also works on a spiritual level and so the microimmunotherapy also provided support here.
Soul
I set out to find the cause of the disease. I ate healthy food and took care of my body. Because of this, I was so shocked at first by the diagnoses and asked myself why this happened. I asked my soul: “What is this supposed to show me?” “What am I allowed to discover about this?” Carrying out several shamanic journeys and luminous body cleansing brought me closer to the issues and causes, allowed it to go in peace and activated my self-healing powers.
The check-up
After almost 6 months, it was time for the next appointment, blood test and check-up. I nervously went to the doctor and the usual followed. I had to wait 2 weeks for the results. “OK” I told myself “ mind hygiene, meditation and confidence in my body will help me through the period of waiting”. Finally, the results were out. I called the doctor on 25th May. The hands damp. The mouth dry. The friendly medical assistant told me, that she had just been handed my results. Everything was ok. Every test was negative and normal. I cheered and she cheered with me.
Thank you
The end of the day was near and the last plan of my self-experiment was set: Champagne, a bathtub full of fragrant warm water and a heart full of thankfulness.
To say THANK YOU to nature. She gave me everything I needed to heal. To say THANK YOU to myself for my discipline and courage to dig into traumas and not -so-nice episodes in my life. To say THANK YOU to my beloved husband who supported me and ate all the “green” food with me and joined me in the detox program To say THANK YOU to my expert supervisors To say THANK YOU to my friends in this and the other world who accompanied me on my soul journeys.
EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE! Be prepared for miracles!
Would you also like to get to know your body better and support your health? I look forward to an appointment with you!
Today I would like to pass on a few thoughts that have matured in me over the last 4 months, and above all have to do with recognising and discovering. It's not easy for me to do this, but it's all the more important. Perhaps it will be helpful for some of you.
In the last 4 months in particular, I have been able to get to know many new people and people get to know in a new way. I have spent hours on the phone, "discovered" new networks, laughed, cried, rejoiced and mourned! I was thrilled, hurt and amazed!
I researched, read, delved into the deepest depths. I was incredulous, stunned, shocked, disappointed. I kept asking myself the question: "Why am I doing this to myself? It's much better to just occupy myself with beautiful things! Light and love! That's what matters - right?"
Then came the realisation
It's important that I deal with it! I have learnt to do research! I have learnt to trust my intuition even more. I have learnt to trust myself even more. I have learnt to differentiate. I have learnt to look and listen even more.
I am learning to be powerful and strong for whatever comes to fulfil my Dedication - to be there for the people who want to face their shadows.
More than ever before, I have realised how interconnected everything is and that I must first look at the shadows in order to fill them with light.
I have discovered:
... that everything that is happening now, with all its positive and negative aspects, is important for the further development of us all. ... that change is only possible if the need for change is present beforehand, i.e. the pressure of suffering increases. ... that there are more and more people who have understood that we are one human family and that we are only strong together!
The changing times
We are in a time of change. Much is becoming visible. Much is being uncovered and unveiled! For some, a world is collapsing. The world view is no longer the one you have believed in all your life. I have seen people who have almost been broken by it. I have seen people who have become strong and courageous as a result.
As some of you know, the topic of "freedom" is an important aspect of my life's journey. Last year, I started a series of lectures on this topic, which is unfortunately on pause at the moment. Especially in times we are in now the topic "beeing free" is more present than ever. Over the last few weeks, I have also became more aware of a few things.
My biggest motivation
One of my main motivations that led me to new paths was to finally be free from all external constraints!
Now I realise that I didn't even know what "being free" meant back then!
It's not just about "external" freedom (e.g. work, relationships, society, etc.), but above all about inner freedom! It's about freeing the inner people who are locked away - in dungeons, behind thick walls or even in gilded cages. But unfortunately, it's not as simple as simply walking up, opening the doors and saying: "You are free".
The fear of freedom
Imagine a prison inmate who has been locked up for decades and is suddenly released. There are many reports about people who can no longer find their way in life afterwards. They don't even know what freedom is. They can't handle their freedom! Or a bird whose door is suddenly opened and it remains sitting inside. Fear is spreading for what is lurking outside. I'd rather sit and do what my master says or be locked up in prison again, where I'm told what I have to do and when I can eat! It's much easier that way!
The definition of freedom
Everyone defines freedom differently. For me, it means freeing myself from all self-imposed and externally imposed constraints, shedding all masks and roles and being completely myself. To reconcile with my inner person and inner children. To take them by the hand and guide them out of their cages.
Just like the bird in the cage and the prison inmate, we all need a supporting hand to get to freedom. The bird should be slowly and lovingly acclimatised to the "outside". The prison inmate should be taken by the hand and shown what life is like.
Loving companions
I consider myself very lucky to have so many people supporting me on my path to freedom. My beloved husband, friends, teachers and healers. I am particularly grateful for the guidance of my power animals, spirits and divine guidance, which only ever bring me as many challenges as I can handle.
Are you ready for freedom?
For me, it was and still is a rocky road, but it's getting easier and easier, and there are only a few hurdles that are really tough.
It is an indescribable feeling to let go of all the masks you have been taught and imposed!
If you are ready to go into freedom, I am happy to stand by your side!
It’s always a pleasure and my heart is full of joy to see the magnificent colours that nature gives us. Isn’t it incredible how the flora gives all creatures on mother earth what they need. If an animal is sick, it instinctively eats the plant it needs to heal. A tea from the delicately scented lime tree promotes perspiration and reduces fever. The lime tree makes itself available to humans in the event of infections. The tea from lime tea blossoms turns red after a short brewing time.
Every plant nurture with its characteristics, qualities and colours one of our energy centers also known as Chakras or Flames. You find here a small collection of plants that strengthen your luminous body.
The luminous body and the interaction with nature
Connection to nature
Nature gives as energy in many ways. Whether it's a walk in the woods or pausing by a river, we can recharge our batteries in nature. It is like a rejunevation to our body and soul. Our luminous body is surrounded by certain influences every day like Computer work, negative thoughts, conflicts etc. Nature gives as balance and power for new things.
My spiritual journey started in my thirties after physical and mental health issues. At that time, I was confused. I didn’t know what was right and what was wrong anymore. What was the truth, what was a lie.
My journey led to the shamanic way, and I took the first step into the spiritual world full of doubts and questions. Full of fear, I jumped into a totally new world. It’s been a journey to my inner self.
The more I get to know myself (this process is far from over), the more I become free and the stronger the connection to the spiritual world becomes, the clearer I see the truth. I learned to trust myself and my inner guidance and so it led me to the journey to myself in the form of a shamanic vision quest I want to tell you about.
Vision quest is a very ancient shamanic method to achieve enlightenment. It was also used as an initiation ceremony.
If someone told me a few years ago: “Go into the forest for three days without food, alone and don’t move!” I would have thought this person was crazy! My fears wouldn’t have allowed me to stay alone in the woods, but it was time to leave my comfort zone and I was looking forward to the adventure.
Half a year before the vision quest, I started my preparations. I adjusted my diet and started a detox program. I looked into my inner processes, my issues, feelings and fears. I meditated and mentally prepared myself for the stay in the forest.
Finally – it was time! I packed my tent, twenty litres of water, a sleeping bag, my shamanic dragon bag, a diary, a toothbrush, a camping mat and off I went into the forest. Tree days without food inside a 6 m circle I wasn’t allowed to leave (except for when going to the wilderness toilete) and dark woods awaited me.
The first evening was peaceful, I felt safe, and enjoyed the seclusion and the sounds of the forest. The first whole day was uneventful, and I was a bit restless because nothing happened. Absolutely nothing! The only thing I noticed was that a few meters up the hill to my place the sun was shining, and I was sitting in the cold and damp darkness. I asked myself: “Why do you sit here and don’t move to the sunny place?” Was I willing to overcome my inner boundaries, to let down my perfectionism and move to another place, although it wasn’t allowed? I was expecting something more than these questions that did not seem important to me at that moment. No spirit, God or angel appeared, no Merlin with his magic wand turned up to initiated me into the secrets of life. No enlightenment, no vision or hallucination. What a disappointment!
“Hm… you still have two days!” I thought and racked my brain about what kind of shamanic herb would bring visions, what I would cook after my return to home (these thoughts weren’t really helpful at that moment) and if I should move my tent to the sunny place or not. I stayed at the dark, damp and cold place and went to sleep supposedly without having achieved anything. The second night was as peaceful as the first.
Well… and then! It’s hard to describe and difficult to find words for what happened after I woke up after the second night. When I woke up very early in the morning, I realised that I had probably slept in a tick nest. The first thing I did in the early morning was to free myself from seven bloodthirsty monsters. These little vampires made me to leave my circle and go to the sunny place. I sat on a small rock and went through an intense transformation process that lasted for hours and ended in tears of joy, warmth, light and sun. I traveled through my life and was allowed to discover old traumas and issues to finally release and celebrate the transformation. I was only a few meters apart from the sun, only a few meters between darkness and sunshine and yet for me it was the beginning of something completely new and great.
These hours on top of the small rock brought me finally back to the beginning of my spiritual journey. The first message I got from the other world was: “Be yourself”. I didn’t understand at first and got angry because of the encrypted message. But at this moment in the woods on top of a small rock and after so many years I understood. I am allowed to be the sensitive and delicate person I am. I don’t have to play roles or wear masks. I am allowed to show feelings, to be angry, sad or happy. I am allowed to laugh and cry. I am allowed to show myself and let my light shine. The time of suffering and pain is finally over. Now it’s time to give my hand to others, to guide them - if they are willing - to their own light, their own sunny place and freedom.
One more thing! Even little, black, supposedly evil vampires have their own place in our world. They are helpful to free oneself from fears and see the sun. 3 days after my vision quest, I removed the last of 19 ticks from my body. Some time later I read Christiane Beerlandt's book "Encyclopaedia of Psychosomatics" and learnt the following about tick bites:
Zitat aus dem Buch Christiane Beerlandt „Der Schlüssel zur Selbstbefreiung – Enzyklopädie der Psychosomatik“.
"...You keep calm, hold your breath, stay in one position. You hardly dare to move/be as you are. You finally force yourself into a narrow framework; you are not allowed to be free of your own accord; you want to cling to something or remain in a certain position because otherwise you would no longer feel safe... You do not allow yourself to "be". You rely on imposed obligations and systems and don't really openly admit to yourself who YOU actually are now... So free yourself from this restrictive position now: Become yourself!..."
And so the circle closes. My enlightenment could not have been better summarised.
My vision quest was finished at the second day and also my first long journey to my inner self. I found what I was searching for.
I have come a long way towards my inner wisdom, my spark, my light and, above all, my health! Everything is interconnected and every living being on this earth deserves appreciation and respect, because everything is ensouled. When we finally become aware of this, everything is so much simpler and more beautiful.
Another thing I was allowed to discover was a new kind of music and singing. I was shown by the spiritual world that, because of my sensitivity, I have the gift to feel emotions, feelings and energies of people and places, sing their songs and help to heal old wounds. Music is an expression of the soul and was given to us to express ourselves, but also as an important healing tool.
The biggest hindrance to truth and freedom is fear. It prevents us from questioning, and it does not allow us to see the truth.
I would like to encourage everyone to look fear in the face, give it a name and thus take away its power. As soon as we take off our masks and stop playing imposed roles, we become more and more who we really are. Everything in our lives can be changed. We have the choice of which path we take and how we shape our future. We do not have to surrender to illness or external circumstances. The truth and the divine spark is within us.
As I write these lines I am already on the next journey. Where this journey leads me to is still hidden behind vails, but I am brave and looking forward to everything that’s to come
Would you also like to gain inner realisation? I would be happy to help you prepare for your own personal vision quest.
